I've been average sized, very much bigger, svelte and thin and now i'm well...fluffy. Let's call it that and pretend like I haven't put on about 20lb in the last year and a half.
I realised when I was thin that it wasn't me. I was cold all of the time and sick of people telling me that they thought I was anorexic (I wasn't, I just ran - a lot - which meant I could still eat a lot too). I became sad, and put on a little bit of weight. I met me boyfriend and became extremely happy...we got take out's, shared biscuits with tea and well, I guess the rest is history.
Actually, what I hadn't realised is that I can't eat like my boyfriend. He has an active job where he has to walk a lot. I don't. If I eat like him i'll put on 20lbs in a year and a half. Oh, wait...that did happen.
Enough is enough. There is no end to weight gain, I of all people know that - you know, having been that "very much larger girl".
I've come to terms with the fact that i'm always going to be a curvy girl. I spent most of my life wishing I were thin before realising that all the women I see pictures of who I think are attractive are mostly all curvaceous and healthy looking. No that isn't a patronising term for 'fat' I mean actual healthy, they don't look like they skipped the last 5 meals and their head looks giant compared to their tiny starving body.
So i'm now day 4 into 'operation loose that fluff' and it's going ok. The darling boyfriend even got me some weights to help me in my mission of 'bingo wings be gone'. I've done weight watchers and it worked for a bit but it seemed a bit like a big ploy to flog you chocolate cereal bars for £3 when in fact it was so miniscule you'd have to eat the whole box to feel less hungry (given the amounts some of the women were buying in my classes i'm pretty sure that's what they were doing).
Nope, I'm down with the good old fashioned calorie counting, watching the fat, eating less and trying to move more. But just to be clear, I don't want to lose all my fluff!